dir. Katsuyuki Motohiro (2008)
Shaolin Girl
is a bit of an enigma. It's really two (maybe two and a bit) movies spliced together. Fair enough, except that the Western equivalent would be The Bad News Bears spliced together with The Matrix (with a bit of A League Of Their Own tossed in at the end).
The plot is paper thin: Rin, a young woman recently completing 9 years of training at the iconic Shaolin Temple, returns to Japan to spread Shaolin through her grandfather's dojo. Arriving in town, she finds her Grandfather's dojo derelict and her former teacher cooking at the local noodle house. No one will tell her what happened to the Dojo, so she moves into the ruins anyway.
Hooking up with MinMin, Rin visits the local university, where there's something very, very sinister happening with the girls lacrosse team (we're never told what—I mean never, it's never explained at all. Ever. Oh and it involves the beach volleyball team—do I smell sequel?). Rin joins the lacrosse team in order to recruit them into learning Shaolin. The Teacher takes time out from his noodle-slinging to sign on as coach. This part of the flick is firmly in the “Bad News Bears” territory—talented but awkward outsider tries to prove herself, fails miserably because she doesn't understand the importance of teamwork and must earn back the respect of her team mates. It's nicely done, with the required elements: The flash of self-realization, the long training montages (particularly well done), the gradually winning over and bonding with team mates, the awkward yet arousing scenes of sexual awakening (okay, I lied about the last part.) .
Then the script takes a wild, spiraling dive into complete whatthefuckery. It turns out that Rin is the illegitimate love child of Luke Skywalker and Bruce Lee—she was sent away to Shaolin to teach her to control the awesome power that churns within her. Apparently this dark power will only be released if she fights (so of course sending her to the most famous martial arts school in history is the perfect way to head that off), and for some reason that is never fully explained the Director of the University wants to battle it out with her. Next follows kidnapping, arson, ambushes, massive free-for-all melee complete with comic relief, and more special effects than you can shake your nunchuks at. Despite the whirlwind of improbabilities and implausibilities, it works. The special effects look great, the fights, while not stunning in their originality, are competent, and the final confrontation (while a little long) is very satisfying.
Almost as an afterthought, the authors suddenly remember that this is supposed to be a lacrosse movie, so the team crams an entire season of games during the credits. This isn't a criticism, as the montage was nicely done. Basically, the filmmakers started with such a wide net, this movie could (and often did) go anywhere, and no one choice was better or worse than any other potential choice. Personally, I would have preferred that the filmmakers either a). stayed with the lacrosse story throughout the movie, or b) used the lacrosse story just long enough to provide a framework for the more revenge-oriented action plot.
Please don't think that because I pointed out this movie's (many) flaws that I didn't enjoy it, because I did. It's not a bad movie by any means, but it could have been a
great one. Still, there are worse ways to kill a couple of hours, and I don't' doubt that I'll watch Shaolin Girl again in the future.
: Oh like I have to explain this one at all. Next...
: The opening scenes gave me nightmares when I was a kid. This one manages to be cooly retro without being too dated.
: Hated this the first time I saw it, now it's one of my favourite. For a Bond movie, it's very quiet, understated and restrained. But it has a very strong story, and that's why it works.
: George Lazenby's singular and much-maligned entry into the series is unfairly snubbed, I think. Despite Lazenby's somewhat wooden performance, OHMSS actually represents one of the strongest scripts ever for a Bond film. Plus Diana Rigg looks ravishing, as always.
: The hidden gem of the Moore era. Sure it's a tawdry remake of Thunderball. Sure it has that really cheesy theme song. But it is also a compilation of everything good about a Bond flick--the underwater stuff, the skiing stuff, the humour, the action, the gadgets. It just works, and yet everyone forgets about it. Shame, really.
: This is Connery's campiest outing, and one of the most fun. The two assassins are just a joy to watch throughout. Along with Thunderball, DAF served as a template for many furure Bond efforts
: The movie where Pearce Brosnan hit his stride. Goldeneye took itself too seriously, Die Another Die didn't take itself seriously enough, TWINW struck just the right balance.
: Dr. No may have been the first, but FRWL was the true start of the franchise.
: So good, they've recycled it time after time after time.
: This one's all about the bad guy. Christopher Lee manages to exude both class and menace in this otherwise light bit of fluff.
: A perfect example of everything that was wrong with filmmaking in the 'eighties. Shallow, lazy, cheesy and sloppy. I read an article in Cinefantastique where the writers basically admitted writing a crappy movie to sabotage Roger Moore. It made me mad at the time. That being said, I still do enjoy watching this one from time to time. It's bad, but it's still fun
: Maybe I'm a heretic, but I find that the first Bond movie hasn't aged well. It's dated, slow-paced and to be brutally frank, boring as hell.
: I'd give detail reasons why this is so bad, but to be honest after the initially interesting parkour chase at the beginning, I lasted about 15 minutes before turning it off and therefore have never seen the whole thing. That pretty much sums it up.
: It's a lot of fun, and it's still great to watch. The reason why it's on the "worsts" list is because there are so many continuity errors, technical gaffes and just plain sloppy filmmaking that it's obvious that the director didn't give a shit.
: remaking The Spy Who Loved me immediately after The Spy Who Loved Me was just an insult to the fans. It's not a bad movie, per se, but for chrissakes at least they had the decency to leave gap of a few films before churning out Thunderball clones
was basically written for Bond as portrayed by Moore, and License To Kill
wasn't a Bond movie in any real sense of the term.
Directed by Ryuhei Kitamura, of 
infamy, 
is a period piece following the adventures of a young orphan girl turned assassin as she and her nine male companions grow up and train together, preparing for the "final assignment".
or 
). The acting is competent and fits in well with the story, and the script moves along at a brisk pace without feeling rushed.
